Jan 21, 2016

All Things Work for Good


This past Sunday marked three years since my brother went to be with the Lord.  I was able to reflect on all the good things that have flourished because of his passing and it really made me smile. God’s promise did not fail.

When my brother was in and out of the hospital, it was hard for the entire family.  I was in the beginning stages of my renewed relationship with the Lord and I found myself reading Everyday a Friday, by Joel Osteen.  One night as I was reading that book after visiting my brother in the hospital, these lines jumped out at me like a magnifying glass: Remember Romans 8:28, “All things work together for those who love God.”  The key word is together.  A difficulty on its own may not make sense, but when it all comes together one day, it will make sense.”

I held onto that promise.  I knew that if God had allowed this difficulty, he would also provide a way through.

So here we are three years later and I can share my testimony on how great God is.  Not only did he get me through such a devastating time, but he also stayed true to his word and His promise.  More than ever, I am able to look back at those few lines that comforted me and grasp how far and wide God brought my brother’s passing to produce such beauty.

As a family, we can say that losing him was what brought us back to church.   The Easter following his death, I attended Fellowship Church and it became the catalyst to a life change not just for myself, but for my family, friends and even strangers.  You see it started out like a domino effect.  I invited my sister, my parents, and my in-laws. Then they began inviting other people as well.  Friends started coming and they started inviting people and the numbers just began to grow and grow.  So many baptisms have happened since then and so many lives have been changed as well.  I know the number will continue to grow and grow and it makes me happy.  God did above and beyond when he comforted me with that scripture.  He turned my loss into such a gain!

Not only have lives been changed, but I began following my purpose.  If you look back to my old entries, you will see how losing my brother changed me.  I started my blog and what was once so hard to do, became so simple.  I learned to be vulnerable with my words and share different topics that touched so many.

I have some exciting news to share!  But before I share that I would like to let you know that The Gentlewoman Evolution blog will come to an end.  While it makes me sad to end this blog after it brought me so much happiness, I am excited to announce my new adventures.  I am starting a new blog and also started a t-shirt line with an intent to share the sweet words and promises of our Lord! 
I can’t wait to announce the launch and I hope that you will join me on my new adventures.


Lord, thank you so much for my readers.  I pray that through ending one thing and starting something new, you will inspire others to follow their passions and gifts.  I pray that you will carry me through and guide my path as I embark on two new adventures.  I pray for strength, consistency, courage and patience.  I thank you so much for what you have placed in my heart and I thank you even more for keeping your promise of working all things for good.  Amen. 



Jan 7, 2016

Holy Anticipation

This could be the day.  

This could be the day it all clicks for me and I free fall into the next chapter of my life.  It could be the day my boss calls me in to let me know that I'm up for the next promotion.  This could be the day that a prayer could be answered. 

I've been reading the Prayer Circle by Mark Batterson once again.  This is my third time. The first time I read it was during the time I was having struggles at work.  I prayed and prayed for a new opportunity to come by way.  At the conclusion of the 40 day prayer challenge, I did not have an opportunity, but I did have holy anticipation. 

Mark tells us that this could be the day.  When we pray hard, when we trust and hold onto God's promises, we have this anticipation that today could be that very day where God answers the prayer we have been praying so hard for. 

I started journaling at the beginning of last year.  In this journal I kept all my prayers going, along with verses I was reading.  When I go back and read this journal I can see how the whole year unfolded.  I see the times I was struggling and how hard I was praying for God to answer my prayer of a new job opportunity.  I saw how eager I was for God to answer the prayer right away, only to see how it took longer than expected.  I also see that in the middle of it all, God was shaping me and teaching me so much.  Had he opened the door any sooner, I would have not experienced the blessing through the lesson.  I like to call those blessons.  

It was a long hard road.  Sometimes I felt like the prayer would never be answered, but I also see how encouraged I was, how I held onto His promises and how I stayed in holy anticipation for the door to open.  I knew in my heart that God would open that door and when He did, He did not fail me.  Six months later, I am so grateful for this opportunity to work at a location where I am surrounded by openly vocal believers and where I truly feel I am making a difference.  I could not be more happy or grateful for all that God has done in and through me over these past few months here at my employment.

So today my prayer isn't for a job, but for creativity, courage, confidence, strength and consistency as I embark on a new chapter in my life.  I know its cliché, but I'm using the New Year as a refresher to start over on a good note.  

I knew that if I wanted this to flourish the way it needed to be, then I needed to do something different.  I needed to do more than just pray, I needed to go back to what I did last year.  Fasting, journaling, praying and doing it all with a devoted heart that showed God how serious I am.  

If you feel you have been praying and praying and God hasn’t answered your prayer, I would like to encourage to do something different.  Start journaling, start fasting (could be from social media like I currently am or even from a certain food), and pray hard with holy anticipation.  It’s actually pretty fun and exciting.  I know God is able to do abundantly more than I could ever imagine. 

Today could be the day.  I am waking up with holy anticipation every day because I know my God did it for me once and I know He can do it for me again. 

Lord Jesus, today I pray that the prayers that are lifted to you will be answered one day, in one way or another.  I know you have our best interest at heart and that if today is not the day, then perhaps tomorrow.  We will trust on YOUR perfect timing and trust you when the answer is Yes, No or even Not Right Now.  God, we will devote ourselves like never before to reading the bible, the book with all answers and journaling and sacrificing through fasting because it is the spiritual atomic bomb that you have given us to destroy the strongholds of evil and usher in a great revival and spiritual harvest.  We love you and thank you for all the ways you have blessed our lives.  Amen. 



Jan 5, 2016

The Great Unknown


You called me out upon the waters, the great unknown.  

My feet may fail.  

I have a problem and it's called fear. I thought I had mastered down this fear thing when I resigned last year with no back up.  (Talk about trust without borders.)  I obeyed and followed through and found myself falling into the arms of the Everlasting.  In the process, my faith was made stronger and my character was built by letting go and letting God.

The process didn't come quickly for me.  If you remember, it was months and months of trying to do things on my own, before I finally gave up on trying to handle my problem myself and gave full control to the man upstairs.

Months later, I'm in the same predicament.  No, it's not over a job, but more so acting on a calling. God has called me to walk on water again, not literally, but figuratively. Walking on water means to do something that seems impossible.  It is to fully trust God with whatever he asks you to do. When Jesus called Peter to get out of the boat and walk towards him in the middle of lake, Peter was scared as most us would be.  Walk on water?  Impossible.  Jesus noticed his fear and quickly said, "Take courage.  It is I.  Do not be afraid." Peter got out of the boat, walked on water towards Jesus, but as soon as he took his eyes off of him and noticed the wind, he became afraid and began to sink.  "Lord save me" he cried.  Jesus immediately reached out to save him.  "You of little faith," he said, "Why did you doubt?" (Matthew 14:22-23)

I always get choked up on that last part, "You of little faith.  Why did you doubt?"  That part resonates with me because I know that is what Jesus would tell me now.  I can pray and pray all day, every day, but if I don't put full trust or actually believe that God will sustain me through, then what good is it?  

We can pray over the same thing day in and day out hoping God will make a move, yet God is waiting for us to take action.  I can almost imagine Him, up in heaven, looking down over me saying, "Yes, I hear you daughter.  I can do all of that and more for you, but if you do not fully believe and trust me, then what good is it to answer your prayer?  You must trust me without borders. Come walk on water and see what great things can happen."

But. It's. so. hard. 

When my daughter was little, she was completely mortified of water.  You couldn't get her to get in the pool.  She so wanted to jump in and have fun with her cousins, but fear always held her back. Over the years she became brave and slowly started to dip her toes, then her legs and eventually she would make her way in and tip toe in the shallow area.  Just this last summer, she surprised me when she learned how to swim and became comfortable going underwater.  I was so proud.  While it took her a little longer than others to do something so simple as swimming, I knew that she had overcome her fear and it meant so much to see her swimming and splashing with her cousins.  

I know that is how God sees me.  He understands my fears and he knows that I struggle with control and the unknown and he constantly tries to put me in different situations and obstacles, not to punish me but to help me grow.  I would always tell my daughter, there's nothing to be scared of.  I'm here. Nothing will happen to you.  Just as I was encouraging her and ready to jump in and save her, God will do just the same.  We are his children and he wants nothing but the best for us. 

My goal this year is to keep my eyes above the waves.  To not flinch at the first sign of fear or any distraction, but instead to fix my eyes on He who created heaven and earth, because He has plans to prosper me and give me a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)  He has promised good things for me, I just need to trust without borders.  He's never failed and He won't stop now. 

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders. 

Let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me.

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander and my faith would be made stronger in the presence of my savior. 

Today I pray that whoever is reading this will take heart and know that you - yes you can do anything through Christ who gives you strength! (Philippians 4:13)  I pray that whatever distractions come in the way of fulfilling the will of God will be recognized immediately.  The enemy knows how to strategically block you from the blessings of God and he will do it if you allow him to enter your mind and heart.  Rebuke him and he will flee. (James 4:7) Above all else, I pray that God stays front and center of your life and may you never forget that His love never fails.