Interview Time GW Style

A couple months back, I asked the featured GW on this blog to ask me some questions to include on my interview series featuring yours truly.  In celebration of me turning 30 this past Saturday, (Yes, 30!) I have included their questions plus a couple more to make a total of 30 questions. 

Enjoy!
                                                        

1.  For those people who don’t you, can you tell me a little bit about yourself?  My name is Vickie, married for 5 years with two children.  I have a teenage boy named Alec Nicolas Mireles who is about to turn 15.  He is very smart, athletic, competitive but also very humble and sweet.  I have a 6 year old mini me named Mia Alessandra Mireles.  Mia is very smart as well, very sensitive, but also very determined and sweet. I just turned the big 3-0!  I am also the creator of this blog, The Gentlewoman Evolution.

My first Mother's Day 2009

2.   (Pearl)What are three pieces of advice you can give someone in keeping a successful marriage? Well I would say put God first always. God is the foundation to a joyful and successful marriage.  This doesn't mean by having God in your life that your marriage will be perfect. There is no such thing.   What it does mean is that by having God in your marriage, He will help you get through whatever bumps and hurdles lay ahead of you – believe me when I say your marriage will have them.  No one is exempt.  Second, Respect. I heard this somewhere; don’t ever do anything you wouldn't do with your spouse standing there next to you.  Third, Keep Dating. Marriage shouldn't become boring or routine and while it does take work to make sure that doesn't happen; you have to keep it fun, and enjoyable.

3.  (Pearl)What are three things in uniting and strengthening a blended family? Well this has been a learning experience for me that I don’t think I had figured out until last year and even then, I'm still learning. Growing up I never imagined myself being a step mom, but the reality of today’s world, it is now common for a family to be blended.  I would have to say God again. God becomes the focal point and the foundation to a joyful and successful family.  Marriage is second and children come third.  This is what I learned at Fellowship and I think it is so right on.  Most people don’t like to hear that your spouse comes before your children; even I thought that at one point.  But a successful marriage brings successful children.  We bear children and raise them to leave the home.  It’s in the Bible.   Our little family has had to make adjustments and we have faced adversity, however I will have to say by having God in our lives and raising our kids to have Christ in their lives has made such a difference.  We have become so much stronger.  

4.   (Pearl)What motivates you to keep reaching for more? Not settling - which is something I use to do a lot of.  Slowly I’ve stripped away insecurities and learned that no matter what my background is, what the color of my skin is, my gender or age……I am capable of so much, even more than what I believe I actually can achieve.  With man things are impossible, but with Lord our God, everything is possible.

5.   (Pearl)How do you feel about gathering your friends and uniting them not only with your friendship, but in church as well?  This has been the best thing ever! I love seeing my friends and family find what I found and feeling what I feel.  Sharing that joy has truly been the best gift.  It is also raising our next generation (our children) into leaders and becoming so close.  I love that.  I love that our children have all become friends.

6.  (Rita) I've been honored to see how you've changed after first starting your blog.  How do you think it’s changed you? It has changed me in so many ways.  It has brought me joy because this is what I love to do.  It has also brought me confidence.  I was so insecure at the beginning, always second guessing myself. “What are people going to think?  Are people even going to want to read my blog? ” But that all went away. I don’t have any of those negative thoughts anymore. I only had a couple of followers at the beginning, but those followers were the ones that pushed me to keep going.  I am forever grateful to those women.  They have no idea how much they had to do with this blog.  Now, I get feedback from people I would never expect about my blog and how they enjoy reading it.  It’s been such a journey!

7.   (Rita) I also remember your vision, your ideas, and your goals for The Gentlewoman Evolution blog.  I remember thinking “the Gentlewoman” was like a mythical creature.  I mean how can she exist?  She’s like something you strive for!  I've learned from you that SHE lives in each one of us and it doesn’t matter what we've been through or where we are in our life, she’s a part of “us women”.  That to me is so very inspiring! Did you originally intend to interview everyday women knowing how much they would inspire others? And if that wasn't the original idea, how did it get to this point?  That was not my original idea.  I truly think the idea was a gift from God.  He saw my efforts and He brought forth the idea which in retrospect is the reason why the blog has done so well and why I have been able to reach out to people that otherwise I would have not been able to.  These women share my blog on their Facebook and in turn voila, a whole new set of readers.  It was such a blessing how I was able to showcase these women, their stories and share that with other people. I wound up being so inspired by their strength and their stories.  It has been a win/win overall and I am so grateful to God for blessing me with this idea.

8.    (Rita) How do you like your coffee?  Decaf.  I get headaches with caffeine.   I’m more of a tea drinker.  Chai is my favorite.

9.  (Tania) How long have you been blogging?  It seems like all my life.  Had YouTube been created when I was a teen, I know for a fact I would have been a YouTube vlogger.  I have always had a passion for writing; as far back as I can remember.  Diaries, writing for the heck of it, poems, songs, even writing letters to friends were always pages long.  I always started blogs online, but never went through with them, due to my insecurities, but as they say, “Better late than Never.

10. (Tania) If you were shipwrecked on a desert island what (3) books would you want with you? Bible for sure.  The best self help book you can find.  It has all the answers to life’s questions.  My second favorite book would be The Purpose Driven Life.  Third would have to be Yesterday I Cried.  That book I love.  I read it many years ago and it is the book that made me realize that I wanted to write a book one day.  It has a lot of pain but also a lot of triumph.

11.  (Tania) What scares you? Scary movies, haunted houses and rides.  I get severe anxiety and I freak out.

12.  (Tania) In your role as step-mom, what has been the most difficult task to overcome?  Any? There have been several difficult tasks.  When I came into the picture Alec was 8 years old and he was use to having his dad 24/7.  Almost immediately, he also had to learn to not only share his dad with me, but with his brand new sister.  It was a lot of change for Alec and for myself and I wish there was more time that he and I could have been able to bond before his sister came along.  My direct attention went simply to my firstborn.  I think I missed out on giving him more of myself.  Things are different now.  He and I have both found a meeting point of where we love each other very much and it is very much a mother/son relationship.  Having step children there are a lot of difficult tasks including but not limited to how much say you have in raising this child, learning how to share your child with another mother, creating a bond, feeling comfortable…….. but it all comes with time.   

13.  (Tania) What advice would you give to women about marriage? Marriage is a very beautiful thing, but reality is, it is very hard to maintain.  Marriage requires lots of work, compromise and respect.  I went into a marriage thinking it was the most amazing thing, which it is, but as the months went by and the years passed, I realized it is a lot of work.  One of the pastors at church once said, “I am not happily married, but I am joyfully married.”  I think it makes so much sense.  Does being married mean you are in love 100% of the time, well no.  But if you really love a person and if you work on it day by day, you will find the inner joy of being married.  I think most people reading this may question that statement of not being happily married, but if you watch the sermon, I think you will agree. (sermon link below)

14. (Tania) This year has been quite the challenge for you.  So many wonderful moments and those that hurt to even think about.  As your friend, I’ve witnessed your pain, most mostly your strength.  That beautiful reassurance everything will be okay, that only strong faith promises.  What do you think holds people back from really being people of faith?  How has the process affected your life? I think people get too stuck on being mad at God.  That’s just my opinion.  I also think people only look for God when things are going bad.  I get it.  I was that way.  When things went back to good, I strayed from God.  It doesn't work that way.  We need to put God first. He should be our everything.  Once you put God first continuously, believe me, everything falls into place.  And I must emphasize that it doesn't mean you are excluded from turmoil. You are not, but God helps you get through whatever comes your way. 

15. (Tania) What is your advice to wo(men) hesitant to learn the word of God? God loves you.  He's not mad at you; he's madly in love with you.  That's what our Pastor always says.  Don't feel like you are not worthy.  God loves us regardless of our past.  Just give Him a chance.  He only wants the best for you.

16. (Monica)  What inspired you to write this blog?  Well I have a passion for writing.  I always knew I wanted to write and deep down I always wanted a blog. My true inspiration came during the time that my brother passed.  It was because and for him that I wanted to start taking leaps.  I will forever be grateful for the catapult his departure sent me on. I gained strength through that time. I knew I wanted to inspire and be inspired.  After several ideas were tossed around, I came up with the name and in turn the blog was born.  I believe the concept has developed over the months.  I love that this blog has displayed my passion and has also in turn inspired others and luckily enough, I have also been inspired.

17. (Monica) What do you feel this blog will do for women?  Hopefully it inspires them.  No matter how big or small, that is my hope. If it means, changing your perspective, being a little more grateful, reading a new book, listening to a new song or being open to change.  I hope by reading my entries and those interviews of my Gentlewoman, I hope women or even men take something from it and either apply to their lives or use to help someone else.  Together, we can all make a big difference in this world.  We can move mountains if we all work together for good and for positivity.  We need to empower each other.  

18. (Monica) If you could change one thing – anything in your life what would it be? The old Vickie would probably have had a list of things. There was that bad relationship, there was that wrong decision I made, there is that friendship I lost, my chance at going to college, my anger, my insecurity, oh yeah, I would have wished all that and more away.  However, what I've learned is that everything works out for good.  I learned a lot of lessons by the many mistakes I made in my life.  There was a lot of character building and also faith building during those times. I can't turn that away.  I try to look for the positivity in everything now, as hard as it may be.  At this point in my life, I would have to say nothing.  It's all made me who I am and lead me to this point in my life.

19.  (Michelle) How has/does your faith make an impact upon your life? To quote Robert Frost, "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference."  At the moment I asked God back into my life, I was lost. I was alive, but I wasn't really ALIVE.  I gave a lot of things up to become a better person and to dedicate my life to being a woman of God.  That has made all the difference. I am living my life for a greater purpose.  My life has changed.  I have realized that everything is meaningless and nothing will ever work without God. The things I use to care about, what I use to think were important are no longer important.

20. (Vanessa) Where does your passion for writing come from? It's been there as long as I can remember.  I enjoy it.  It's my God given talent. 

21. (Vanessa) Being a mother who also works, I can imagine that there’s a lot on your plate.  How do you find time to separate life’s duties from writing?  It's hard.  It's a balancing act.  Chris (my husband) told me at the very beginning, I will do what I have to so you can blog.  I'll take care of the kids so you can write.  He is the best. I couldn't do what I do without him and his support.  I'm sitting here in the den typing away and he's watching The Incredibles with Mia.  Also, my kids are older so they are independent.  Mia is 6 and can have fun in her room or watch a movie.  Alec is about to turn 15 and he can take care of himself.  They all know that I love doing this and they all support me.  I couldn't do it without all of them.  They are my little love bugs and they know this makes mommy happy. Unfortunately, there isn't a lot of time, so that's why there aren’t new posts every day, but I try my hardest to make sure I make time for this because I love it.

22.(Vanessa) Do you enjoy other hobbies? Yes, I do.  I love running, I love dancing, shopping, reading, fashion, make up - I'm quite the girly girl.  I try to make time for a little of each here and there.  I also love serving at church. Right now I have taken a break from running and I've started Zumba, which I love because I get to exercise and dance at the same time.  I don't go out much anymore so when I attend Zumba, I feel like I got my dancing desire checked off.  

23.(Vanessa) What is one thing in life that you are determined to accomplish? I have told Chris a few times, I want to get paid to do what I love to do.  My hope is that this blog takes a hold of the world.  I want to continue to inspire and be inspired by different women and men.  I want my kids to view the world by the beauty of what God created versus what society has deemed beautiful by media, magazines or the internet.  I want to be a good role model for them and I want them to know that the sky is the limit.  I want to reach people all over the world and let them know about how good our God is.   

24. (Vanessa) If you could live anywhere else besides Dallas, where would it be and why?  I am such a home body I could never move from Dallas, just because all my family is here.  I don't see myself venturing out just because of that reason. 

25. (Vanessa) Is there any positive advice you can give to one who is about to get married? Keep God first.  It is through Him that you will have a successful marriage.  Don't ever forget that.  

26. Who inspires you and why? There are several people, things, books, quotes that inspire me.  I have been inspired tremendously by all the women I have featured on my blog.  Their strength is infectious.  I am inspired by all the books I read.  I am inspired by my parents who didn’t have an education or easy home life, who then turned their lives around and made God their foundation and became successful and giving people.    I am inspired by my family, my siblings, my children, my spouse – the list goes on and on.

27. What is the best piece of advice that you have received? There have been two things I have learned through advice from my mother and also by watching Oprah. (LOL)  The first is to always forgive.  Second is to always put God first.  You can go far with those two pieces of advice.  Oh, let me add one more.  Pastor Ed always says this, “You don’t get to get, you get to give.”  In other words God doesn’t bless you so you can keep it all; He blesses you so you can be a blessing to others.

28. How do you feel you have changed in the last 10 years?  I’ve changed a lot.  10 years ago I was 20 years old – it was a bad time in my life.  It’s been almost like a complete 180.  I am in such a good place right now.  I am confident and I am determined and I know what my purpose is in life.  What mattered then no longer matters.  

What mattered then, no longer matters

Always out and about

                          Celebrating my 30th talking about the old days and all things motherhood and future dreams. My, how we have all changed for the better.

29. What do you think women in our generation need to hear?  Love yourself.  Don’t compare yourself with other people, especially other women.  The grass isn’t greener on the other side; it’s green wherever you water it.  Keep God first.  Learn to forgive.  Don’t ever give up.  Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you are not worthy.  Step out of the box.  Learn something new.  Volunteer.  Love everyone.  Go to church.  Read your Bible.  Don’t criticize but empower and inspire.  Everyone can make a difference and everyone should try. 

30. What are you most proud of?  I’ve never said this before, but in this moment in time, I’m really proud of myself.  I’m proud that I found my purpose and that I’ve followed through on the road God laid out for me.  

30!

30.  Wow.  I remember being 18 years old or maybe even younger and having this perception that “30” meant you were old.  That was then.  Now, sitting here only days away from being thirty, I do not think that way at all.  I’m not scared of turning 30.  As a matter of fact, I believe I am embracing it.  Thirty doesn’t mean your prime time is over.  To tell you the truth, I believe it means your life is just about to begin – well at least in my case.

My twenties, oh my twenties, they were a roller coaster.  My early twenties were filled with an immature attitude towards life, a bumpy road and a sense of thinking I could figure it out on my own.  Boy was I wrong.  In the midst of spiraling downhill I was caught in the arms of this handsome fella who became my saving grace.  At the time it didn’t seem that way as we were BOTH immature, but after learning we were pregnant, an uphill of growing up began.  Entering my mid twenties I was learning how to be a mother, a wife, a step mother, creating a career and finding myself all at the same time.  What a whirl wind that was. I was trying to figure it out on my own again, eventually realizing in my later twenties that I could NOT figure my life out on my own.  I had to accept that I had no control over the unexpected and the unknown.  Thus began my spiritual journey and my invitation to let God back into my life.  I look back on my twenties as a time of self discovery.  I picture myself 10 years ago and “she” is almost a stranger, a person at times I am embarrassed or ashamed of, but ultimately through this journey, really proud of.   (Yes, you can be proud of yourself.)

During these past 10 years, I became an adult.  I dated the wrong guys, lost all sense of self confidence, made new friends and lost others, moved out of my parents home, experienced independence, got pregnant, engaged and married (yes, all in that order), I lost my job, but also found a great job which in turned open the door into a career in the HR field.  I found my confidence only to have it diminished, I lost more friends, I was betrayed, I tried new things, traveled, lost my brother and most recently made new friends, ran a half marathon, found my purpose, found confidence, chopped my hair off, went on a limb and created a blog,  accepted God back into my life and even became a Flavour Sister Lead.  Whew!  (See I told you it was a rollercoaster.) And even then so many other things occurred over the years including continuously trying to people please.  I realized that the only thing I can count on is change. One of the hardest parts of growing up is letting go of relationships that I thought would last forever.  The upside has been learning to keep “quality over quantity” in mind and learning to put time and effort into those who matter even if it’s just a few.

I’m about to be 30 and it’s exciting.  I have learned to accept my life and the person I see in the mirror. While that doesn’t always reflect the negative thoughts that surround me day to day, it has been a process and I’m more accepting of myself now at 30 than when I was 20.  I have also learned that this life is what I make out of it.  I can’t let setbacks withhold me from realizing my purpose in life.  It’s no one’s fault but my own for the choices I made or didn’t make.  It is up to me to take care of this one and only life I have been given. Everyone says life is short and I think we realize it the older we become.  It is so true.  And it’s never too late.  I took a big step of faith with this blog and I am so happy that I did.  Mark my words, don’t ever be too scared to try. 

I couldn’t be happier to enter this next chapter, a time that I truly believe will be the best yet. I want to celebrate everywhere I’ve been – even the not so happy parts and all the future endeavors that lay ahead of me. I want to live this one life of mine - I mean REALLY live it. At the end of my journey I want to look back over my life and feel a sense of pride and accomplishment that I truly did.

Gentlewoman, Josie DeLeon

I find a lot of my inspiration in everyday women, mostly because they are the most relatable. I recently became so inspired by an old high school friend, who I actually have not seen in over 10 years.  Her name is Josie and we were in Drill Team together.  Josie was the type of girl who was everyone’s friend, very goofy, fun and likeable.  Fast forward to 2013, I find her on Facebook and what I notice is her love of food, cooking and creativity.  Little did I know Josie had been diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL), a form of cancer in your blood.  The way I found out was through a comment she left on a picture I posted on Instagram of a hairstyle I wanted when I first decided I wanted to cut my hair -   you can find that story here.  I reached out to Josie one day just to thank her for the motivating words and for giving me a different perspective.  At that time we went into further conversation and she told me about her illness.  I knew right away I wanted to feature her on my blog.  Not only was I inspired, but I knew her story would be able to reach and touch several women.

I cried reading her story – not out of pity, but out of pride.  I was so proud of her strength and so inspired by it.  I am very honored to include her as my first Gentlewoman for 2014. Enjoy!

Josie DeLeon

1.   For those people who don’t you, can you tell me a little bit about yourself?  Hello! My name is Josie Deleon. I am 31 years old. I was born and raised in Dallas, Texas. I am the youngest of five and I was raised by my dad and grandmother who I am named after. I am married but I haven't changed my last name due to my illness and a whole lot of paper work I would have to fill out. I've been with my husband for a total of 11 1/2 years but have only been married for 2 1/2 years. I don’t have any children of my own, but I have a stepdaughter named Angel.  She is 16 years old and I have been a part of her life for almost 11 1/2 years now. It's been a joy helping take part in raising her into the young lady she is today.

2.  You inspired me to cut my hair!  Your words really hit me like a ton of bricks. Can you tell my readers what exactly happened to you to cause you to lose your hair? First off I'm very happy to know that a few words I said helped you with your decision! I was diagnosed with (ALL) Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. For those who don't know what that is, it is a type of cancer of the blood. The treatments for this and most cancers is chemotherapy which is a very strong drug used to stop cancer cells from growing.  At the same time it destroys healthy cells which include your hair - eyelashes, eyebrows and all other bodily hair. 

Rewind to 2009: In my eyes I thought I was pretty healthy, eating pretty good and working out regularly. For a whole year before being diagnosed my leg bones would ache so bad that it would make me cry and I couldn't sleep. During this year I went to get checked three times and the doctors said it was probably my muscles from working out. I knew it wasn't that because I didn't feel it in my muscles – I knew the difference.  All they gave me was muscle relaxers and pain pills but even that didn't help. They did tell me I was anemic and prescribed me some iron pills because I was always feeling tired and light headed. I had been working at a marble & granite company for almost 10 years, but eventually grew tired of it.  I decided to apply at Parkland and I got hired! I had only been there for 3 days when the girl who was training me was showing me where things were in the supply room.  I began to feel like I was about to faint. There weren’t any chairs in the supply room so I told her I felt like I was going to faint and I was going to sit down. (I had to tell her cause I didn't want her looking at me crazy, like why is this girl sitting on the floor.) I thought, here we go again with my fainting spells.  I figured it will just pass. She panicked and called the ER to come check me out. That was certainly one of those being at the right place at the right time moments! Paramedics came and checked me out.  I'm not sure why or what made them take me to the Emergency Room to draw blood, but boy am I glad they did! They got the labs back and two doctors came in with a look on their face as if something was wrong.  They told me, "You need to be admitted, you have Leukemia." I was clueless as to what that was. They didn't tell me much more until I was up in a room, but by this time I was already googling it. When I looked it up all I remember is seeing the word CANCER and nothing else. I became numb and all I kept thinking was that I was going DIE. I mean that's the first thing that comes to mind when you think of CANCER.

When I got settled in the room and the doctor came I asked him, “Did I hear right or was there some kind of confusion?” He said "You have Leukemia and we need to start treatment ASAP.” He also went on to say that I could have died if I had waited any longer. This leukemia is aggressive and crowds your blood and doesn’t allow normal cells to produce in your bone marrow. I didn't know what to say or how to feel, I was in shock. After that I was not able to talk so I had to text my husband telling him that I wasn’t feeling well and that I had to be admitted, but that I was okay. I knew he was at school so I didn't want him to worry.  After all I was in the hospital the best place to be at that moment.

When I had my first chemo treatment my nurse told me that my hair would start to fall out and suggested to just to shave it off.  She said if I were to see longer chunks of hair come out it would be harder for me to deal with. After the first round of chemo I came home and thought about what she said.  I cried but then I sucked it up and told my husband to get his clippers and shave it all off. He looked at me and said "Are you sure?" I said "Yes, it's all eventually going come off." That made me feel in control - doing it myself rather than feeling like chemo had taken control over me. He pulled out his clippers which were old. I don't know how long it had been since he used them because he would go to the barber to get his hair cut. He plugged it in and turned it on. When I heard the loud buzzing noise that it made I closed my eyes and tears started to roll down my face. He turned them off and asked again "Are you sure you want me to do this?" I remember just nodding my head up and down - just do it. So he did.  Keep in mind these clippers were old and had not been used in a long time. He went in for the first shave (I still have my eyes closed with tears rolling down my face) then I feel a tug and it kind of hurt. I was thinking “I thought this is supposed to go nice and smooth?” I felt another tug.  I opened my eyes and I'm like "Ouch! That s**t hurts! What are you doing to me?” He says "Oh, I think I'm supposed to put oil. They are old and I haven't used them in a long time." So I'm standing there with a patch of hair gone and I look at him and he looks at me and we just laughed! He went and put oil and came back for round two.  It wasn't as bad as the first shave he did.  Some hairs were a little longer than others but I was just glad for it to be over with. I sort of felt like Demi Moore in the movie GI Jane (not quit as buff though lol). At that moment is when I finally told myself it's just hair - it’ll grow back!

I just wanted to let you know how much I mean to my daddy.   After the first chemo and having no hair he had my brother shave his hair off which was something really big for him as he never cut his hair. He always had a ponytail. He did it so I wouldn't feel alone. I actually have his ponytail saved in a box. That's not all, my sister and a few of my nieces shaved the sides of their heads too so I wouldn't be alone. Several family members and close friends got tattoos of the orange ribbon because that's the color for leukemia.

3.  Being told you have cancer must be one of the worst things anyone can hear.  I love how you have embraced your situation and turned a negative into a positive.  How were you able to do that?  Well it wasn't easy that's for sure. When you hear the word CANCER the first thing that comes to mind is “Am I going to die? “ Then you question why is this happening? Once you are able to accept what is going on in your life and know that it's only through Him that you find peace it then becomes a little easier and clearer of the path you should take.

It was very hard in the beginning. All you do is question why.  You want to crawl under a rock. I had deleted everyone on my Facebook one by one and then I deleted my account. I didn’t want to talk to anyone and I didn't want anyone to know, not even my own family other than my immediate family. While in the hospital I had visitors but when visiting hours were over and they had to go I was left feeling lonely. No one actually felt what I was going through. After each round of chemo I would come home and wait for my blood counts to go up with the help of some injections I had to give myself in the stomach. Even when I was back at home, I still felt alone. My husband was going to school at night to pursue his dream of becoming a police officer and I didn't want to hold him back from achieving his goal. I couldn't be selfish. When I was alone I would be afraid of something happening to me. The mind is very powerful.  When you constantly think negative thoughts, you can cause yourself to believe it and that can cause stress, depression and anxiety. I ended up causing myself to have an anxiety attack which felt like a heart attack. I had a tightening feeling in my heart then my left arm started feeling tingly so that made me panic. Then I started feeling like I couldn't breathe and I was about to faint. My husband took me to the ER and they did blood work and an EKG.  Everything came back fine.  My nurse told me it was just an anxiety attack and if I wanted she could give me Xanax. I didn't really know what Xanax was but I had heard that it was addicting so right away I said no thank you. When I came home I started googling how to help anxiety. It’s simple - just keep your mind occupied, read a book, watch a movie or whatever it is that keeps you at ease. That's when I told myself, “Josie you need to get yourself together. God is with you and will not leave your side so stop thinking something bad is gonna happen.” Since then I haven't had an anxiety attack. I had to be strong for myself and for all of my loved ones that had been praying for me.  I couldn't give up and let those prayers go to waste. I really feel better than ever and I’m the happiest I've ever felt. I think everything happens for a reason and when things like this happen to you I think it humbles to the point where you just feel so blessed to even be alive.

4.  God promises beauty for ashes.  I’ve seen it in my life, in other people’s lives.  How do you feel you were “rewarded” for keeping your faith to get you through this period in your life?  What has been the upside of it all? This was definitely a blessing in disguise. You would think after going through so many treatments and spending so many nights in the hospital that it would be a bad thing, but it really gave me a chance to talk to Him. I feel the biggest reward was my life.  The gift and blessing of allowing me to live and share my experience with others.

I had a bone marrow transplant on January 25th 2012. The percentage that a sibling will match you is 25%. I was very blessed to have 4 siblings. They all had to go in for testing but even then they say some don't have matches. Weeks went by and each one of them got a call back letting them know who matched and who didn't. Three out of four matched me 100%! All the nurses and doctors were amazed and commented how you don’t see that happen. They then eliminated one because of their age and it was now down to the two  younger ones. The doctors let them talk it out and see who was available to go and do all the testing. My oldest brother Jay who lived close to the hospital was my donor. I will forever be thankful for my brother and allowing me to live. I bought him a necklace from Things Remembered. I had it engraved Big Bro + Lil Sis = Life. I had it blessed before I gave it to him and he says it has helped him a lot which makes me very happy. This January 25, 2014 I will be 2 years in remission (cancer free). The day I had my transplant they say that's like your second birthday because all your cells are wiped out with very strong chemo that you receive before the actual transplant to prepare your body to receive all the new cells.  It's like I'm being reborn in a way. I know I didn't do this all by myself. I always thank God, family and friends for being a great support system!

5.  How can women keep up with their health and make sure we are getting the right checkups to catch something upfront versus waiting until something drastic happens? I think since we know our bodies better than anyone else, we shouldn't ignore those signs that our body gives us. If you fell that something isn't normal that should be more than enough for you to go get checked. I know a lot of people don't like going to the doctor and are afraid of what could be wrong but it's better to be safe than sorry. So many of the same side effects can be from something small like a headache to something major like a brain tumor. I'm not trying to scare anyone but it's the truth we often try to be our own doctor not knowing what the real problem is.  We figure "it'll go away or I'll just take an aspirin". Don't wait until it's too late.

6.  What is the best piece of advice you have ever received? Simply to trust God. He knows us all very well and He knows what our needs are.

7. What are your dreams? My dreams are to become a better me mentally, physically and spiritually so that way I can be a better wife, stepmother, daughter, sister, Tia & friend.

8. Who inspires you and why? I don't think I can just choose one person that inspires me because there are many people that I've come across in my life that have inspired me in their own way. My daddy would be my biggest inspiration.  He was brought up by my grandmother and did not have much. He graduated high school and went off to the Marines to serve our country. He raised me along with my siblings as a single father with no help from the government or any kind of child support. He busted his butt working hard every day. Now that I'm an adult and I have my own bills and my own struggles with a husband, I think to myself WOW it must have been really hard for him to raise us the way he did especially us girls, but he never showed it. He always wanted the best for us. That being said he didn't give up no matter what the situation was. My husband inspires me because of his faith in God and his eagerness to learn more. I could go on because like I said there are many who I've been inspired by but these two men are really important to me and stand out the most.

       

9. What do you think women in our generation need to hear? Girls need to learn how to love and respect themselves and not be influenced by society. Just because everyone is doing it doesn’t mean you have to. Pay attention to the decisions you make because one day those decisions you make can affect you in the long run.

10.What are you most proud of? I am most proud that having gone through this has made my relationship with God stronger, which didn't allow me to give up but only fight harder.